


Miracles of the Pale Kind

by Fox_Salz



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fluff, Good Moirail Gamzee Makara, Hair Brushing, Horn Decorating, M/M, POV First Person, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Pampering, Purring Trolls (Homestuck)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:35:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26097976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fox_Salz/pseuds/Fox_Salz
Summary: Gamzee makes a romantic gesture to his best beloved shouty motherfucker.
Relationships: Gamzee Makara/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 18
Kudos: 88





	Miracles of the Pale Kind

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, the end of [gamkar month](https://miraculous-miracrails-month.tumblr.com). Couldn't resist doing a little fluff. I feel like there's so little new fluff being written for these two.

“You stupid, romantic, panaddled dumbass!” your sweetest shouty motherfucker hollers your way. He’s positively fuming, cute ass blush on his face. Could just kiss it all over, but you think that might get a clown’s teeth kicked in. “You can’t fucking do things like this!”

“But I already up and motherfucking did, beloved.”

You give him a lazy smile. It only infuriates him more, which only tickles you more in turn.

“Goddamn it, Gamzee, I can’t handle your bullshit. So fucking inconsiderate, being this fucking sweet, you bastard. You can’t just spring this shit on me, you romantic nookstain!”

He starts getting his rant on full blast, growing more and more flustered as he presses hands to his face, all hiding himself. A shame, because he’s so damn pretty and nice to look at, but damn a ninja’s gotta admit that it’s nice seeing him so worked up like this. You just gaze with all the love in your pusher, taking the sight of your diamond in. You could rap out a slam poem of epic proportions over your Karbro. An actual odyssey of a relationship told through your favorite art form. You have several versions actually but shit ain’t right enough yet to reveal. Want that shit motherfucking _perfect_ just like he is first.

Speaking of your best bro, his words have devolved into an auditory clot bleeding screech you know so well. Makes your chest flutter in fondness.

“Shoosh,” you say and he all up and stops instantly, looking at you like he done saw beyond the multiverse.

“Did you just _shoosh_ me?”

You reply by papping him. He up and looks ready to murder you.

“Gamzee, remove your paint smeared, stupid clown hand from my face this instant or so help me I will rip out your posture column and beat you with it.”

The calm of which he informs you of this makes your pusher dance. Your Karbro is so damn amazing. A motherfucker can hardly handle it.

“Most beloved motherfucking diamond of mine, is that a yes? A clown’s gotta know.”

Face cherry red he rolls his eyes.

“Yes, Gamzee, you goddamn bastard. I will let you brush my hair for this date you’ve set up against my will.”

You beam, pleased as can motherfucking be, and pick your diamond up. Gotta dodge his limbs as he flails around all squawking undignified like. You give another shoosh as you place him down on a pillow you put on the floor of your respiteblock before even asking your moirail. He pouts, arms crossed, and ain’t it the cutest motherfucking sight your ganderbulbs done witnessed. After offering him a big old grin you sit on a pillow behind him and take out the basket of hair care shit.

Usually he’s the one up and using it to try and tame your impossible mane. Thought you might return the favor. After all, diamonds are a two way street and you intend to drive that bitch like you stole it.

First you run your graspers through his hair like he does for you to work out all the tangles you end up with. Course, he don’t really have any that couldn’t be taken care of with a brush, but damn do you enjoy this. So goddamn _tender_. A motherfucker can’t resist. ‘Sides, your Karbro has started to relax. Miracles, man. Pure fucking miracles of the pale kind.

You take extra time around his little horns practically hidden all up in his cloud of hair. Can’t help really massaging them, trilling when Karkat trills. Ain’t no way he meant to, you can tell that, but damn are you glad he did. Sweetest fucking sound in the whole motherfucking multiverse.

Eventually a motherfucker has to move on or else ain’t no one making it to your date. And you’re proud of yourself for actually setting this shit up, so you can’t get your easily distracted ass all distracted. Makes you all giddy thinking about how much your moirail is gonna love your pimp ass fucking date. You’re a clown with _surprises_. A regular jack in the cracker box.

Grabbing the brush you slowly run it through his hair. Your Karbro is all sorts of relaxed now. Such goddamn pretty sounds all coming out of his chirpbox. You keep on gently brushing him, one hand on his hip. Ain’t fucking necessary, a motherfucker just likes to hold on sometimes.

By the time you set the brush aside he’s all sorts of blissed the fuck out, purring freely. Your cardiopusher done burst with love and is trying to pick up all its little pieces. In the meanwhile you take out the horn adornments you been dying to show off. Got them special just for this occasion: two strings of alternating red and purple balls. Short, on account of your diamond’s horns’ stature. Fun sized little nubs you can’t get enough of, but does only give so much room to work with.

You string them around his horns all delicate like, like you ain’t some giant uncoordinated dumbass. Karkat hardly seems to notice, eyes all half lidded and glazed over. Any bits of your pusher still intact explode all over again, like a popped balloon lusus.

“My loveliest motherfucker, time to take a gander at your pretty self.”

Usually he’d snap at you for daring to compliment him, but all he manages is a slight self depreciating huff as you hold a mirror out in front of him. It takes a good minute for him to notice the beads. You know the exact moment ‘cause his ganderbulbs get so wide they could up and fall right out.

“Got matching ones to put on my horns, if’n a motherfucker doesn’t mind decorating his clown.”

You bring them out and hold them high.

“I never should have watched romcoms with you, I shouldn’t have read them out loud to you, I shouldn’t take my goddamn eyes off you.”

His voice is practically a whisper. You just grin all wide like, which he catches in the mirror and scowls at before whipping back and snatching them out of your hand.

He commands you to bend down and you do without complaint. Feels like your face is being hashed open, you’re smiling so hard. Gently he laces the strings of beads around your spiraling horns, really getting into it since you got so much more real estate. He takes his time but you ain’t mind at fucking all. You’d wait all contorted up for eons if it meant you could keep seeing that soft, pale love on his face, gleaming in his eyes. There’s nothing left in Paradox Space that needs your clownery so you’re free to up and spend the rest of forever with your beloved if you so damn choose. And goddamn do you choose him, and in the truest of miracles he chooses you right back.

“Alright, Gamzee, you’re done.”

You straighten, beaming at your diamond. He smiles back, and your pusher crumbles all over again. You hold your arm out and he links his through it, and together you head out for your date.

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, time to not write gamkar for a whole year again, lmao.


End file.
